simply me...

 i have never thought that it would happen to me, i mean i sometimes having nightmares about it, sometimes i use it to come around but then when it actually happened, i dreaded it and almost had the idea in ending my life. when i saw my 2 boys' pictures it got me thinking, NOT i must not end my life too soon just because of it.

i first tol my husband, and he almost ended his life too, he cut his hair and make himself like a prisoner of war, he shed so many tears but he could not do anything about him. he tried texting his friends to get back, but i told him i do not want to have a husband that is a murderer , so he stopped the idea.

secondly, i told my mom, she said i ignited it, and accused of being so stupid. but what can i do? was so helpless. but it doesn't count to her. she told my aunt, and my aunt says things about me that is different, that i was like that even when i was young. that is why my lola is very protective of me.

so you see, its me to blame for my own actions for whatever happened to me. but then i am not guilty coz i do not want that to happen. it just did so help me God.